Deana Cracolici

SETTING THE STAGE...

Hello, my name is Deana Cracolici. I am 44 years old, married, mother of twin girls who are now 15 years old. As far as my knowledge goes I have no family history of any type of cancer in my family. My parents are divorced since I was a baby and have

no contact with him so I am only going by my mothers side for medical history. I want to give my medical background also. I have Hyperthyroidism, high cholesterol, anxiety and depression and acid reflux. My biggest and only surgery was my c-section in Sept 2002. Since I do not have my father's family history I had genetic testing done, it came back inconclusive. I got my period when I was 9 years old, it was never regular. I have been on birth control pills on and off in my early 20’s. It was Ortho Tri Glycerin Lo. I have smoked cigarettes since I was about 14 years old and have quit on and off throughout the years including my pregnancy. I had to take clomid to get pregnant, I got pregnant with triplets but lost one in the first trimester. I had a terrible pregnancy from the beginning. It started with Hyperemesis Gravidarum { excessive vomiting during first trimester}. I also got severe hypertension and was preeclamptic in the final trimester. My house was hit by Hurricane Sandy, received 5 ½ feet of water on the first floor. I helped with the demolition of that and the yard. There are four women including myself who have some sort of cancer on my block where I live.

THE STAGE IS SET...

I had my Baseline Mammo at 40 years old. My next Mamo was at 43 years old and that's when my cancer was found. I was recalled the following day for additional testing. The first biopsy was done to my left breast and as I lay there I knew it was cancer. I was trying to breath and

be calm but I was freaking out on the inside. Tears dripping down the sides of my face into my ears and hairline as I layed there. Waiting, Waiting, Waiting. Time goes so slow. The woman doctor came in and said it's definitely Breast Cancer I just don't know what kind and it has to come out. I left the hospital numb, like my feet did not even touch the ground as I walked to the parking lot where my car was. I just kept on repeating to myself “ you better live till the girls graduate high school” over and over and over again. The mamo also found something suspicious in the right breast. I had an MRI and biopsy done. As I lay there stomach down with my head in the holder so it can't move I had a complete breakdown. Tears pouring down my face, snot gushing from my nose and shaking like I was freezing. The room was filled with doctors and nurses trying to calm me down, but nothing was working. Finally I agreed to have one doctor hold my left hand one nurse hold my other hand and the dr was in between me, the machine and floor doing the biopsy. The results came back as calcifications in the breast. That was the true beginning of this never ending nightmare, that continues to this day. Then I began the true obsession of online research, read things I had some knowledge of but most I did not and that's when my brain was like yes I understand what you are reading. That cancer research done in some far off country with medical words you cannot even pronounce my brain understood. BIG MISTAKE!!!! I thought about cancer 24/7. I really tried to be positive and to the outside world I was a trooper so strong so brave but on the inside the voice in my head was like” you are going to suffer and die” “you will never get rid of this”. Slowly I began to change from the person I once was to someone more quiet, more patience, more not willing to share my fears because I had to keep up this strong bravado.

I MET MY SURGEON...

My breast surgeon I used was my second opinion, he came in the room and was so nice and gave me hope. He explained everything on the computer with pictures on paper through diagrams until I understood. Of course as soon as I left his office I would forget some stuff and call back to ask them to explain it to me. I cannot stress enough how important it is to feel comfortable with your surgeon. If you don't keep looking for one. No one at my surgeons office ever made me feel like an annoying pain in the ass about any repeated questions I ever had. Nov 15, 2016 I had a left breast mastectomy with immediate reconstruction. The cancer had spread to the first two of my lymph nodes. I was officially diagnosed with left breast Invasive Ductal Carcinoma stage 2A. Since the type of cancer I have, that it spread to my lymph nodes and my age I was strongly urged to have aggressive chemo and radiation. January 2017 I started chemo, I was given ACT{ adriamycin, cytoxan and taxol}. I was given four rounds of the AC part then finished off with the taxol. This chemo also known as the “red devil” kicked my ass then when I was down it came back and kicked my ass again. I was just breathing going through the motions of hair loss, weight loss, black circles under my eyes,couldn't eat, vomiting, dry heaves, couldn't drink. I honestly thought it would never end. I actually asked my oncologist half way through if I could stop cause I felt like I couldn't do it anymore. She convinced me to complete it, then came radiation for six weeks everyday. That was even more depressing because you sat in the same waiting room everyday with the same people knowing we were all there for the same reason, CANCER. It didn't matter what kind each of us had, we were bonded for life through this.

I'M STILL HERE!!!

So now I am up to the yearly Mamos and Sonograms { had the first one all clear} monthly blood work, 5 year cancer pill { exemestane} with a

monthly shot of Zoladex. This is something that I will have to live with for the rest of my life. I AM ALIVE I MADE IT THROUGH THIS PART!!!!! My only advice to anyone at the beginning of this journey is to follow your gut. It will never lead you wrong, weather it's knowing something is wrong with your body, medications, doctors or anything. You are fighting for your life, you know your body better than anyone else. Unfortunately I welcome you to this sisterhood { If your a guy I welcome you to my family too} but please know and always remember that without these friends I would have been lost. I am wishing each and everyone of you strength, love and happiness always. My email is stray9567@gmail.com or my instagram is deana7157

Deana Cracolici